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Bugs me...

I've got another rant coming...

You know what's been bugging me?

Parents who don't support their kids.  The ones who have so high expectations, they don't expect their child to meet them at all.

They talk about it in the child's very face.  
I know it's not good to build up the supposedly-helpful "self-esteem"
(since it's really pride, a sinful thing, trust me),

but really?!  

Telling people that your child is dumb?  
Telling people not to be disappointed in the child...
even more than people are typically disappointed in their child?  

Ok, so maybe your child isn't the next Albert Einstein or Wolfgang Mozart, but really?
Do you have to put them down when they can hear you? 

It pains me and nearly breaks my heart to watch kids hear their parents say that... to have no hope in their kids.  Soon the kids are hardened to almost everything their parents have to say, since nothing is worth listening to (at least it feels like it). 

But what harm can an encouraging word do?
None.
Then why is it so hard to do it?
*sighs*

*resolves to be more encouraging the next week... to speak words that will build other up and not tear them down or at least be silent when I can't think of something kind to say*

^^^ A resolution I need to make regularly...

~CJ
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  1. EssieJune 5, 2011 at 12:08 PM

    **Applauds*** :D
    I have had the very same thoughts...
    Once while I was volunteering at the library, these two moms were talking and one was saying how her son was JUST PLAIN STOOPID!!! I sat there shocked pretending I didn't hear... Not that she cared.
    It's also a culture thing from what I've learned. In some cultures it's not polite to say good things about your kids, apparently. O__O I learned this after relating a phone call I had with an aunt of mine who talked about how her daughter, my cousin, was lazy, et cetera. My mom explained to me the culture difference... But yeah. ;P
    Great post, Miss CJ :)

    ReplyDelete
  2. Caravyn JazminJune 8, 2011 at 11:09 AM

    Aww - that's sad to hear :( .

    Yes, I am well aware of the cultural "thing". But there is a difference between actually "trash-talking" about your child... and just abstaining from all flatter/encouragement/praise. I can attest because I was raised in the culture you speak of. I think there's a balance, between speaking lots of words of encouragement and when to keep silent. I lean towards less flattery and more helpful words on how to improve. But definitely NO "You're stupid, dumb, and hopeless about anything intelligent."

    Thank you for your thoughts, Lil' Es :D .

    ReplyDelete

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